Robijn is Dutch fabric softener brand owned by Unilever. I recently bought a bottle of their new “Robijn Crème” concentrated fabric softener. When I read the back of the bottle I could see that their marketing department had gotten free reign:

Verwen je zintuigen & kleding met Amandelolie. Robijn Crème is pure verwennerij voor jezelf en voor je kleding door de rijke crèmige samenstelling en verzachtende Amandelolie. Een echt verwenmoment! Zoals genieten van een heerlijke chocoladetruffel die smelt in je mond. Gun jezelf dat speciale moment. Ook op een gewone maandagochtend.

I will attempt a (quick and dirty) translation into English:

Give your senses and your clothes a treat with Almond oil. You are pampering yourself and your clothes with Robijn Cream because of its rich creamy composition and its softening almond oil. A true moment of pampering! Like enjoying a delicious chocolate truffle which melts in your mouth. You deserve that special moment. Also on a regular monday morning.

WTF?! I wish I could know the genesis of this brilliance. Does anybody know who is responsible?